July and just another challenging day in the life of a parent
It's July and a significant month at that. Our 3rd wedding anniversary falls on the same day as Ian turning 16 months, Ian's grandparents have finally come home from a 3 month long absence, and we're halfway into the year 2007. The past month has brought about a fair amount of changes - neighbour has moved away, colleagues who tendered their resignations, and as for me, a boss who has very much upped the ante again and now expects 101% thorough work, and "2 steps ahead, always".
Hearing this makes me feel tired, and not the least bit motivated. Throw in the glum look I get from Ian on weekday mornings and his "weekends with Mummy and Daddy let us not waste precious time" behaviour and I pretty much end up asking myself again why is it that I'm not making myself and my son happy by staying home. We spent quality time together this weekend - he loves it when I carry him to the supermarket or for walks along Strathmore Avenue, even if it's just to look at birds flying. Of course to him nothing beats a trip to the East Coast, but it's another form of joy for him and somehow I feel guilty as to why I can only do this with him on weekends. I realise he's growing up fast and is more aware of these things now because somehow I can read it in his expressions and moods. In a way, going to work is a lot harder too because he learnt that some goodbyes are tougher to make than others.
But is my staying home better for him? With dual income our financial position is comfortable and we're on track to saving for his future. So to stop work is not the most practical thing although the temptation is always there for some reason. Maybe what is best is a job with flexi-work arrangements. But please, this is Singapore the land of increasing competitiveness and mounting bills. Flexi-work is like taking 30% of time off work and also taking 30% of your previous pay home. Life sucks sometimes because you can only have one or the other and both are equally important. And either option comes with its full set of sucky issues.
Oh well, just another challenging day in the life of a parent.
posted by Maril @ 9:47 PM
5 Comments:
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